[Lazarus] why handle is 0?

[FreeMan]

If I'm not wrong I found my bug in the 4. day

Component has :
procedure LMTimer(var Message: TLMTimer); message LM_TIMER;

here is hold to timerevent
....
var B : boolean;
begin
   if csLoading in ComponentState then Exit;
   if (FTimerID = 0) then begin
     FTimerID := SetTimer(Self.Handle, 1, 500, nil); <-- start
    DebugLn(['UpdateTimer;FTimerID > ', FTimerID, ' : Self.Handle >', 
Self.Handle]);
   end;
....

here is destroy event of component
var B : Boolean;
begin
   DebugLn(['Destroy;> ', 1]); //destroy started
   if (FTimerID <> 0) then begin
    DebugLn(['Destroy;FTimerID > ', FTimerID, ' : Self.Handle >', 
Self.Handle]);
     B := KillTimer(Self.Handle, FTimerID);
    DebugLn(['Destroy; FTimerID > ', FTimerID, ' : Self.Handle >', 
Self.Handle, ' Killed>', B]);
     FTimerID := 0;
   end;
   DebugLn(['Destroy;> ', 2]);//destroy ended


and this is debug lines:

UpdateTimer;FTimerID > 1 : Self.Handle >_*140042733101744*_
TMainIDE.DoFixupComponentReferences UNRESOLVED BEFORE loading 0 
Root=FRM_Appointment:TFRM_Appointment RefRoot=DM Refs="MainConn"
Destroy;> 1
Destroy;FTimerID > 1 : Self.Handle >_*0*_
Destroy; FTimerID > 1 : Self.Handle >_*0 *_Killed>False
Destroy;> 2


where is my handle ? why its "0" if its come 0 howto access self handle 
so access then childs?

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